The Guide to Dealing With Stress: Keep Calm and Carry On

Recently, Instagram had the horrible idea of posting the “Ask Me a Question” badge. Of course, this gave people a reason to stress how important they thought they were.

I posted the same badge followed by a series of story post stating that I actually hate questions. And everyone would do well to mind their business. As if that would ever happen, especially on social media.

Nonetheless, I got a few laughs (which I was ultimately going for) and one question which made me rethink my don’t ask, don’t answer stance.

The question: How do you handle stress and remain nonchalant?

The Truth

So, funny thing. I don’t! I’ve learned to limit the things that stress me.

I actually don’t handle stress considerably well. I may not have outburst but, I don’t deal with the immediate emotions that come with stress. This always causes me problems later like migraines, tension in my shoulders, and irritability.

Eventually, once I realized that these problems caused chronic issues for me, I had to identify what were things that caused me to stress. Once I figured out what those things were, I had to figure out how I could prevent those things from happening.

Now, I know what you are going to say. “Some of those things are beyond control.” Yes, you are correct. And because they are beyond our control, stressing about those things won’t change anything.

Once I was able to wrap my head around the face that this does nothing, but make me feel ill, I stressed less about arbitrary things.

Stress shouldn’t get such a bad rap. It is responsible for our fight or flight reflexes that has kept humans alive for hundreds of years.

Use The Checklist

Stress in and of itself is not bad. It is our response to it that needs to work. Knowing what makes you stressed is more than half the battle.

• What are your triggers? Do your best to stay away from them.
  Change the environment that causes your triggers.
• Acknowledge when you feel stress. When you feel that specific feeling immediately vocalize “I am stressed.” You are mentally alerting yourself to the emotions you are feeling and helps ground your sudden mood change. Once you know you’re stressed,
• Try things to release stress. Go for a walk/run, talk them through with someone, deep breath, inhale lavender aromas, pray or meditate.

When you calm your nerves, talk through your process. Why was I stressed? How can I prevent that from happening again? How did stressing help me?

I guarantee more often than not, the last question will always be answered, “It didn’t.”

There will be so much time wasted and energy exhausted because of it as well.

Do The Work

Once, I was able to train myself to minimize stress and my negative response to it I was able to function better.

These steps while seemingly simple are very hard to conquer. It has taken me years and years (AND years!) of practice. You have to reprogram your emotional response network that has been operating autonomously forever.

Be patient. It will take time. I still have to practice these things as new stress triggers arise.

What are some ways you deal with stress? What are some ways you can work on your response?